


Of Tides and Shallows

by Kaydu



Category: Free!
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Eventual Happy Ending, First A03 Story, First time writing pairing, Idk what i'm doing, Jacked up timeline, Light Angst, M/M, Mildly Dubious Consent, No Beta, Non Canon really, OOC, Obsessive Behavior, probably
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-27
Updated: 2019-02-18
Packaged: 2019-10-17 09:04:13
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,528
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17557403
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaydu/pseuds/Kaydu
Summary: Rin needed a taste of Haruka like a drowning man needed air, and since he's leaving for Australia for a few years he figures he might as well suck him in like a starving man because why the hell not?





	1. What is Restraint

**Author's Note:**

> For this story, Rin and Haruka are both 17 years old and Rin is just about to leave for Australia where he will be gone for the five years of training.

There was an eerie silence. The kind of silence that makes people uneasy... as if something monumental is about to happen. And well, in this instance, that isn't so far off from the truth. Rin can feel it in the tightening of his muscles across his shoulders and the back of his neck as he clenches his jaw, teeth gnashing together behind his closed lips. He feels almost feverish and more than a little desperate. He's never been so high strung except for when he and Haruka are on the starting blocks side by side, waiting for the buzzer to ring out so that they can dive into the water and just swim. His eyes are wide and feverish, locked onto an ocean of blue before him. Haruka's eyes have always been like that.. a bottomless depth reflecting the sea and all of it's hidden secrets and treasures. Like any pirate or thirsty desperate sailor, Rin has always been captivated by the sea and in turn, Haruka. He's felt the incredible desire and possessiveness since they first met. Rin also knows, deep down in his heart, that the obsession that he holds for Haruka is wrong. Not out of any misguided embarrassment towards feeling the way he does towards another man, but more in the intensity and what lengths he would go to to gain even a shred of acknowledgement of attention from the dark haired boy. 

Rin knows he is bound for hell, if it is truly a place after death. Again, not because of his obsession or because of his love, but simply because he can't help himself. The words had tumbled from his lips faster than he could have stopped them. It wasn't something he wanted to have stopped anyways because well... everyone has their limits. When Haruka had stood there in front of him with that impassive expressionless face, his eyes locked onto Rin's face as if searching for something specific when he had asked, "You're leaving?," Rin had simply replied, "Aren't you going to give me a goodbye present?" With all the cockiness he feigned to possess his lips had turned up in a rueful smirk, his heart thudding behind his ribcage as fast as a galloping horse. Haruka had stood there silently, almost emotionlessly, until the fateful words, "What do you want?" 

Hence the silence. That oppressive, hot silence that has Rin feeling as if his breath is being stolen right from his lungs without actually having to actually breath. What does he want? The impossible. The ridiculous. The unimaginable. The most twisted, most conniving.....

"You," slips from him as easily as water from the clouds when rain falls. 

There is no resistance which in hindsight should have probably made Rin slow the hell down and assess the overall situation. There is silence as he invades Haruka's personal space, silence when he places his palms against the wall on either side of Haruka's head, and silence when he slots his taller frame neatly against Haruka's own, one of Rin's long legs slipping in between Haruka's knees and pressing inwards until his knee is against the wall and his hard thigh is in contact with Haruka's groin. Of course those ridiculous oceanic eyes betray nothing, thin pink lips say nothing, even as Rin bends his neck to bow his head to bring his own face closer until their breathing mingles together. Rin can tell his is already faster than normal as his blood sings through his veins at the simple contact between them. 

Rin wishes even after all this time of being apart of Haruka's life that he could know what the dark haired male is thinking. He wishes that he could interpret the level stare that is directed at him right now. He wishes so much that he could unravel that silence and dig into it and find some sort of meaning and words beneath it, but he cannot and never has been able to and for a moment he feels more rage than he does desire. His red eyes narrow as he slides one hand across the wall and over the slender column of Haruka's neck, pushing up and in so that Haruka has no choice but to raise his chin up to allow for easier breathing, though those blue eyes fall half mast as they continue to watch him. To judge him, he thinks, as his thumb pushes into the space just behind Haruka's jaw in what he knows must be an uncomfortable and nearly painful pressure. 

'Well', Rin thinks to himself silently as his lips curl into a vicious smile before he closes the space between them and devours Haruka's cold lips as if he's the tastiest banquet Rin has ever had, 'I guess it doesn't matter anymore. I'll just do what I want.' 

Licking and nipping at Haruka's lips despite the lack of response or engagement from the other male has Rin's body lighting up on fire as he drops his hands down to trail along Haruka's shoulders to his ribs through his shirt and finally to his hips where he grabs a bruising hold and hoists up so that Haruka's feet leave the ground. Still with the silence, but Rin hardly cares anymore. He has made up his mind even as his fingers wrap into the bunching muscles of Haruka's thighs to support his weight up against the wall and Rin rocks his hips forward once, nice and slow and hard, against the other man's while allowing himself a small groan. He trails his lips against Haruka's cheek, down to his jaw, and then down the long neck to his shoulders where he nibbles at the skin that he can reach around the collar of Haruka's shirt. 

It pisses him off, most of the time. How calm and collected Haruka always is. He wants to shatter that composure... to break it, and him, until there's nothing left to hide. No where for him to hide. 

With this thought in mind he hums in the back of his throat, still not looking at Haruka's face as he turns and paces the three steps towards his bed where he tips them both over and drags Haruka's nearly limp frame up the mattress so that his head is cushioned on the pillows. Sitting back on his haunches while straddling Haruka's hips gives him good view of his torso where the black t-shirt that Haruka is wearing has ridden up to show off his very impressive abdomen. Rin can feel the saliva pooling in his mouth and he swallows thickly, hooded eyes taking in the tanned skin beneath his roaming pale hands. Rin has never been able to tan no matter how long he spends out in the sun and so the bronze skin beneath him is both and insult and a turn on. Really everything about Haruka is a turn on for Rin, though. 

He shoves the shirt up even further as his greedy hands map out the muscles beneath him. He notes that they jump and twitch at his caress, but he is on a single minded path of debauchery and stores the reactions in the back of his mind even as he bends over to lave his tongue over one pert, pink nipple. 

There is still that all consuming silence from Haruka- not a single heavy exhale or gasp to be heard, even as Rin takes that nipple between his teeth and nibbles on it like he would a sucker or ice pop. His fingers dance down along soft skin to meet the hem of Haruka's gym shorts which he nearly destroys in his eagerness to get them off of the slender hips of the male beneath him. 

His prize, inch by inch, is slowly being revealed to him and with every moment that passes he can feel himself getting harder and harder. There's no way that Haruka can't feel the jutting length of his erection either... it's pressing heavy and solid against the inside of one of his thighs, a dangerous promise that Rin has every intention of delivering on. 

He leans back, just enough... just enough to trail his lips and tongue back up the expanse of Haruka's chest and up to his lips where he whispers that promise softly and somewhat nastily, his teeth nipping at the bottom lip jutting out and already swollen from his earlier attentions. 

"I'm going to ruin you, Haru."


	2. The Wolf

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin is determined to take what he's wanted for longer than he can even remember. Is the price worth it?

Everything is scorching hot, at least to Rin. Haruka's skin is a welcome reprieve to him... as his burning and sweaty hands travel over the expanse of Haru's skin he can only revel at how its the perfect contrast of heat and cold. Haru has always been the tall drink of water that Rin has needed to cool himself down but this time it feels more as if Haruka is the cool wind to keep him from combusting from his all encompassing desire. 

He's divested Haruka of all of his clothing and has met with zero resistance and zero words, as is typical of Haru. All silence and stability. Rin feels his lips cutting across his face in a sarcastically mean smile as his eyes take in the beautiful sight before him. He has Haruka right where he has always imagined him.... on his knees, face burrowed into a pillow, perfectly shaped ass stuck up into the air for Rin's large hands to cup and knead and lick and bite as he pleases. Faintly he recalls the many, many dreams that he has had where this was the position he had Haruka in and he finds himself only half satisfied because in his dreams Haruka is begging him for it, thrashing and sweating and keening until Rin gives him what they both want. 

The Haruka beneath him is eerily silent and still, however. Nothing of that sexual, begging creature exists in reality and Rin allows himself only a moment of disappointment for that. What he wouldn't give for that to be the case but logically he knows it cannot be. He knows that the real Haru, the flesh and blood Haru that his questing fingers are discovering before him cannot be that wanton creature his imagination has conjured. He's ok with that, though. It doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because in the end he has the real Haru right here beneath him where he has always wanted him regardless of if he is what his imagination wants or not. 

Rin's chest is tight and nearly heaving as his hands and fingers, slicked with the lube he religiously has kept filled and ready in his bedside table, ghost between Haruka's firm cheeks searching for his overall goal. Once the pad of his index finger finds it he can't help but suck in a sharp breath in excitement, his mind going a bit fuzzy as he blinks rapidly and takes it all in again.

Haruka is here. Haruka is here with his chest against the bed and his ass in the air, begging to be taken. Haruka's face is pressed into the pillow that Rin sleeps on every night, long and nimble arms cradling said pillow around his head as his knees dig into Rin's mattress. Rin notes idly as he rubs against Haru's entrance that even now the other male hasn't said or done anything other than get into whatever position that Rin has placed him in and for a moment Rin just wonders at how surreal that is, because Haruka has never let anyone make him do anything. 

Rin takes just a moment to breath in the scent of his own arousal before he slowly chooses to slide his index finger through the first ring of muscle that he so wants to bury himself into and that is when he receives the first indication of any sort of reaction from Haruka. 

The lithe body beneath him gives the slightest of jerks and Rin absently notices that Haruka's hands ball into fists around the pillow that his face is buried in. Humming he leans down as he slowly draws his finger back out before thrusting it back in, his lips searing a pattern across the back of Haruka's neck. And because he has nothing to lose now in his own mind he makes sure to tilt his head just enough to whisper roughly into Haruka's ear, "I'm going to fuck you until you can't walk straight for a week." And Rin really means it. He looks at tonight as if it is going to be the last and only opportunity that he is going to be able to indulge in his sinful and delicious thoughts. Rin can almost believe that he feels a small shudder run through Haruka's body but he can't be sure and so he goes back to his incredibly important task of preparing Haruka to receive him. 

He may have been in love with Haruka for as long as he can remember, but he is also a man. And as a man, regardless of everyone believing that he spends every waking moment thinking of swimming and how to better his swimming, he has been practicing in other ways. Practicing lovemaking. Giving, giving, giving, until he knows exactly what to do to make his partner incoherent beneath him. It's something he is neither proud of nor disgusted with... he looks at it as a necessary step in order to bring Haruka to a shaking mess beneath him. It is possible that he has jumped the gun in his haste.... but he had no other choice. He has put it off longer than he should have and is now at the end of his rope of tolerance and time. It is only Friday and although he has just told Haruka today that he is leaving, he doubts that Haruka understands that it is Saturday night that Rin will be boarding a flight and not looking back. He has no intention of letting anyone know, really. It's better that way. A cleaner break where no one will beg him to stay and no tears or snot will find its way onto his shoulders during departure. 

The back of Rin's neck is prickling with sweat and he can feel his hair sticking to it as he adds the second finger and starts to scissor them to loosen up the tightness he feels. The clenching around his fingers only increases his desire. He knows that Haruka has never had any sort of sexual intercourse with a male or a female. Most of their group has contemplated that he is either too emotionally stunted or completely clueless as to when others flirt with him. Rin has always suspected the latter because no matter what, Haruka is insanely attractive and he has seen the girls googling him from the corner of their eyes and Haru's oblivious marching towards the nearest pool or water source. Huffing out a laugh at his thoughts, he watches Haruka's back muscles flex as Rin slowly begins to nudge his legs apart so that he can settle between them even as he tests out the resistance and tolerance to a third finger. Surprisingly it's welcomed and Rin feels his heart stuttering to a stop behind his ribs and his whole body stills and his balls tighten up in anticipation. He knows without a doubt that even if Haruka is mentally or emotionally prepared to take him, his body is. 

Rin rips his fingers from inside of Haruka and fumbles with the small bottle of lubricant he had discarded to the side earlier in order to lather up the full length of his cock which is straining like a dog on a leash, the veins prominent and the head stained nearly a dark purple in his desire to be sheathed inside of Haruka now now now now now!

He bares his teeth again, snarling to himself as he hesitates momentarily at that point of being able to backtrack. He can't, though. Not with the heady sight of his erection straining and pointing towards Haruka's prepared hole as if it belongs there. 

Slowly, ever so slowly and agonizingly he presses forward, his legs trembling and the hands gripping Haru's hips shaking as the head of his erection meets the opening of Haru's body before slipping inside and even though Rin has felt the inside of many men and women... more than he can count anymore... his nerves fire off like an electrical current has passed through his body and it causes his hips to prematurely jerk forwards and bury the entire length of his cock inside of Haruka as if it was meant to be there. 

Rin instantly stills and feels Haruka tensing around him and he almost thinks he hears the sound of a breathless gasp but can't be sure. The only thing he is sure about is the raging inferno surrounding him, burning him from the inside out as a bead of sweat slips from his temple and to his lips where he licks it away on a gasp of euphoria. He has been dreaming of this moment for years... the moment that he can feel now where Haruka's body clenches around him tightly and he presses his forehead down between Haru's shoulder blades as he tries to shift his world right side up considering he feels as if he has been flipped upside down. 

His rough and ragged breath rakes out over the smooth flesh beneath him even as he turns his head so his cheek presses down instead of his forehead. He's trying to center himself as best as he can even as every instinct and desire in his body is telling him to pull back and thrust back into the wet heat surrounding him. He is able to control it for just long enough to get his breathing under control before his hips are pulling back as he sits back up, his right hand sliding up from a hip to cup over Haru's right shoulder even as he snaps his own hips back forward to bury himself deep as he can within Haru again. 

There is still no sound. Even over his own ragged breathing and breathy moans he can hear nothing from Haru as he starts up a steady and deep rhythm that he knows from experience would normally have his lovers keening in pain or pleasure or both .... and yet nothing. Silence as usual, which pisses him off and he angles his hips just right in order to cause Haru to start sliding up the bed. He feels only the smallest bit of satisfaction when one of Haru's arms swings out to plant a hand against the headboard of Rin's bed to stabilize himself so that his head doesn't start banging against the wood instead. The slap of skin on skin is the loudest sound of all and spurs Rin on more as he sucks his lower lip between his teeth to bite down and keep back the words he wants to say... how much he cherishes Haru, how much he loves him, to plead him to join Rin in Australia so they don't have to be separated. 

In the end the only thing that Rin is strong enough to do is plant his feet into the mattress beneath him and lean forward to lift both of their hips up further as his thrusts become more vicious and unforgiving, his red eyes watching the way his hard flesh disappears over and over again inside of Haruka in desperation while sweat rolls down his own body with the effort and strength he exerts with every thrust.


	3. Colors

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Rin gets a dose of reality. Kind of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please forgive any errors or awkwardness. Had to write this chapter on my phone and well, that’s annoying. I also have issues with switching tenses in which I write. Please feel free to point out anything that rubs your fur the wrong way and I’ll be happy to fix it. :)

Time neither passes fast nor slow for Rin, though he knows once this time has ended it will seem like it has only just begun. He keeps his brutal pace, angling his thrusts in the same direction for a little while before shifting every so slightly when he feels he needs to. He’s searching for anything to make Haruka fall apart. The small gasp he thinks he may have earned is not enough- would never be enough truth be told. He craves a panting, begging Haru and even if the reality is that he will never be able to witness that, he will be damned if he doesn’t at least try. 

There’s a slight tremble in Haruka’s thighs that can’t be seen but that Rin’s desperately wandering hands can feel. Whether it’s from Rin’s abusively strong thrusts or from the way he has pushed Haruka’s hips so far off the bed that his knees no longer connect to the bed and he has to support most of his weight with the muscles in his calves and thighs with the balls of his feet on the mattress is hard to tell, but Rin relishes it all the same. So much so that he eats to continue testing and pushing and seeing what other parts of Haru that he can get to shake in exertment. 

After one particularly hard shove of his hips he stills, buried to the hilt and panting so hard his own lungs feel like they could explode. His eyes blink away sweat that has tried to drip in and obscure his vision of the perfect length of Haru’s back as he contemplated how best to proceed from here. With a huff of breath and a small roll of his hips he easily reaches out to pry both of Haru’s hands from the headboard and takes a second to wonder when that had happened... he hadn’t even seen Haruka move his other arm, and with Haruka still keeping his face firmly burrowed into the pillow, Rin can’t gauge whether or not the other man is even making any kind of expression. 

With a bit of awkward shuffling, because no matter how much practice Rin has forced himself to endure some things in bed are just inevitably awkward, he is able to get both of Haruka’s hands behind his back, smaller wrists held locked together within the iron grip of one of Rin’s hands, and he -jerks- hard enough for the discomfort Haruka feels makes his knees drop back onto the bed and his muscles in his back and abdomen to flex as he bows off of the bed with a gasp that scratches the itch in Rin’s chest every so slightly. Rin’s erection slips from Haruka as this happens but he isn’t too upset about it, not when Haruka’s shoulders are pressed back against his chest and and with Rin’s chin resting over the curve of Haruka’s left shoulder pressed against his neck he can see the bright redness flushing at least one side of the other mans face. Haru has angled his face away from Rin’s searching gaze but that’s okay too because in this position he can see and feel the way Haruka’s breathing has turned hard and fast in his chest. 

‘Point to me, maybe,’ he thinks to himself as he lets Haruka’s wrists go just to dip down and pull his legs out from under him while twisting him at the same time. Haruka goes down with a soft sound that Rin can’t interpret onto his right side, his left arm immediately moving up to drape over his face. Rin allows it, for now, as he opens Haruka’s legs up by looping the crook of his elbow under the back of Haruka’s left knee, settling down between them and guiding himself back into Haruka slowly to savor the new position and admire the flush spread across Haruka’s lithe chest. 

Groaning as he sets up a torturously slow but deep pace, each roll of Rin’s hips ending in a hard twitch to ensure every single inch of him is inside of Haruka, Rin can’t help but wish that he could read minds. To be able to know the inner workings of Haruka’s mind has always been just one of his many desires concerning the other man. Did he enjoy the brutal pace? Does he enjoy deep or shallow penetration? ....... is he even enjoying anything at all or is what Rin is doing equivalent to ra- ...no, Rin stops that train of thought immediately and yanks his attention back to his actions, forcing those unnecessary questions into the back of his mind. It doesn’t matter anymore because Rin has committed to this and has accepted the rather high inevitability that their friendship no matter how deep or how long will probably end after this because nothing about this current situation suggests otherwise. 

Rin settles back a little further onto his heels which causes Haruka’s hips to shift just slightly and, oh. Rin would have never heard it if he was still causing the bed to creak with his frenzy before. Would never have been able to pick up the soft hitch of breath nor see the hint of teeth biting a lower lip half hidden behind a strong bicep. Oh. Rin feels himself spiraling down the metaphorical rabbit hole as his entire existence homes in on that small part of Haruka’s face that he can see as he flexes his hips and thighs to drive back in, stronger than before and with more dedication. He sees the skin around Harus mouth and chin twitch and teeth seem to dig in harder and..... and. And and and and, over and over again he mindlessly goes after those small little reactions. Are they from pain? Pleasure? Does it matter? His entire lower body is on fire from exertion, his balls so drawn up and tight that he has to focus half on not let himself tumble over the edge before he’s ready to have to stand up and walk away and never see Haru again. 

“Haru,” he groans out and the sound of his own voice raspy and hoarse in its thickness startles him so badly his upper half jerks Haru’s legs further apart even as he’s driving forward and whatever that does.... Haru’s voice which has been hidden from him until now, basking them in that ever present odd silence, rings out into Rin’s ears as sharp and loud and earth shattering as the gong of a bell vibrating through every inch of his existence as Haruka’s lips part in a cry. 

If Rin wasn’t lost before this point, he is now. Before Haruka can capture his lips in his teeth again, before he can take a breath, before anything at all Rin has revved 15 to 100 in two seconds and snarls into the air as he starts pounding hard and fast again. Over and over again he’s rewarded for his efforts by Haru’s voice gasping or hitching or keening in a quick ‘ah!’ He continued on, ruthlessly hammering at what he knows must be Haruka’s prostate, his red hair sticking to his sweaty face and neck. It doesn’t matter anymore, nine if it does, because even if Haruka hates him now he will force this momentary pleasure on him as hard and fast as he can to burn the memory of those desperate sounds as deeply as he can to carry him through the rest of his life.


End file.
